KISS-Keep It Simple Sister

Hello Everyone!

2011-02-09T10:04:00.000-08:00

Hello to all of my Keep It Simple Sister blog readers!

I had to give this blog up last summer because it was simply too much for me to keep up with after my surgery (which went well, but I reinjured myself shoveling snow.)
I have recently picked up the blogging ball again and have started a new blog called Saving Money Makes $ense.

Saving Money Makes $ense is a blog that contains links to articles about saving money. There are also short posts with simple strategies for anyone who wants to save a dollar can use. These are evergreen articles that can be used as a resource for you.

Saving Money Makes $ense is not a blog announcing the latest coupon deals, coupon match-ups and freebies. There are many wonderful bloagganistas who do such a fine job of that already.

So please take a peek at my new blog and follow.

Thank you!

Surgery is Not Simple

2010-07-15T05:00:00.000-07:00

By the time you read this, I will be recovering from much needed rotator cuff surgery that I had on July 13th.

I first injured my left shoulder in 1998 while I was weight lifting. After some theraputic daily exercises, I rehabed myself. I just had to be more careful when I was exercising to not reinjure my shoulder.

Then in 2002, my Dynamic Duo came into my life. I held and carried my twins everywhere in the house, many times both at the same time! I carried apnea monitors for a while, two car seats, and a big double stroller whenever I went out.

When my twins became toddlers, I was carrying two heavier children everywhere and carrying them off from many climbing adventures. My son needed to be "brushed" three times a day as part of his occupational therapy for his sensory issues. He did not like being still for this, so I held him with my left arm and brushed him with my right.

In 2004, I saw my orthopedist for the first time. By the time my twins were eighteen months old, I had reinjured my left shoulder, had done some damage to my right shoulder, damaged my ulner nerve in my left elbow and developed carpal tunnel in both hands (I type with wristlets).

For the past six years, I have had a few rounds of physical therapy and many cortisone shots. It had gotten progressively worse, and I needed surgery years ago. But I did not have it, because there was no one to take care of my kids for me. So I just kept getting cortisone shots, counting the years until I could get myself fixed.

In December, it was more painful than before. The shot did not completely do the trick it previously had. In April, when I came in for another shot, my doctor looked at me and said, "We have been dealing with this injury for six years. Do you think it is time for an MRI to see what is going on and how to fix it?"

I agreed.

As I type this post, I am a few days pre-surgery. I am nervous, but am looking forward to the day when I be go without pain or discomfort, which I am on a daily basis. The degree just varies. I even said to my kids that Mommy might even be nicer since I won't be hurting anymore!

I may have some posts scheduled and I may not, it depends if I have time. I do not want my readers to think I have abandoned my blog or stopped reading theirs, it's just that I have to focus on recovery for a while.

Enjoy the next few weeks!

Getting Your Summer Orgainzed is Simple

2010-07-14T05:00:00.000-07:00

Having a great summer with your kids is simple if you do a little planning. While every August, the office supply retailer, Staples, airs the “It’s the most wonderful time of the year…they’re going back!“ ad on television, complete with happy parents grateful for the school your beginning once again, you needn’t feel that way.

Yes, these are called the "lazy, hazy, crazy days of summer", but one way to beat "I am bored" is to have things the children look forward to.

In this artilce I wrote on Infobarrel.com, I detail how to get your summer days organized so all of you can have a great one!

http://www.infobarrel.com/How_to_Have_a_Great_Summer_With_Your_Kids

I hope this help you!

Happy Anniversary

2010-07-12T05:00:00.000-07:00

Today my husband and I are celebrating our 23rd wedding anniversary. We met at age 18 during the first week of our freshman year of college, and we married 4.5 years later. I was 22 and so young! We have had our peaks and valleys over the years, as any long-married couple does.

We used to go on vacation for our present, now we are lucky to simply go out for dinner! This is the one night when we splurge and don't use a coupon!

Do you have a special way that your special someone and you celebrate your anniversary?

(photo courtesy http://www.photos8.com/)

Inexpensive Crafts for Kids at Home are Simple

2010-07-05T05:00:00.000-07:00

We are in full swing for summer vacation. For the days when it is too hot to go anywhere, or storms are threatening, here are some ideas for indoor fun!

It is a good idea to get the ingredients ahead of time so you are ready for a fun indoor day. Don't forget to take pictures for your summer scrapbook!

Paper Mache

This is a great thing to do both indoors and out. Here is a link to three different recipes:

http://familycrafts.about.com/cs/papermache/a/blpmpastes.htm

Play Dough

Here is a link that provides eight variations on homemeade play dough:

http://www.creativekidsathome.com/activities/activity_8.html

Edible Play Dough (Candy Clay)

Here is a recipe for edible play dough:

http://www.infobarrel.com/How_to_Make_Edible_Play_Dough_(Candy_Clay)

Homemade Paint

Painting is fun, making your own paint is even more fun! Here is a link:

http://www.allfreecrafts.com/christmas/paint.shtml

Make Paper Airplanes

Here is a great site that lets you select easy, medium ,or difficult for your design.

http://www.paperairplanes.co.uk/planes.php

Origami

The ancient art of Japanese paper folding is lots of fun for kids of all ages. Do not worry if you do not have origami paper. Simply cut computer or copy paper into squares. Here is a link with great designs:

http://www.origami-instructions.com/origami-for-kids.html

Please share some other links or ideas if you have them!

Skillet Lasagne in a Jiffy

2010-07-01T06:00:00.000-07:00

My friend Susan gave me this recipe. Quick, easy, and oh so delicious!

Skillet Lasagne

Lasagne noodles broken into quarters (about 1/2 box)

28 ounce jar of your favorite pasta sauce

Fresh garlic

Ricotta cheese

Mozzarella cheese

Take the jar of pasta sauce, add 3 cups water - boil in a deep skillet. Then breakup 8 oz lasagna noodles (half a box)into it,in quarters. Cover and simmer 16-18 mins. Add pressed garlic (to your taste), then add scoops of ricotta (1 cup total) to it, as much mozzarella cheese as you'd like, and cover for 3 mins till melted.

In Loving Memory of my Daddy-Skin Care Made Simple

2010-06-29T05:00:00.000-07:00

Fifteen years ago today, my father died from melanoma. It was first diagnosed three years earlier. He had lymph nodes and several moles removed, and afterwards his blood work monitored every few months.

By the time it came back, it had spread all over every one of his vital organs, including seven in his brain. He fought back with intensive radiation, but it was of no use.

I would take my newborn daughter and pack up for three days to help out at home. Then I would come home for three or four days so my husband could see his daughter, then make the two hour trip again to see him and help out my mom. That would last for five weeks, until my father died one morning while we were all asleep.

My dad was fair skinned and freckly, much like my mom, my brother and I, and two of my three kids. He had had a few severe sunburns throughout his life. He only thought it would hurt temporarily. Who knew it was a one way road to an early death?

Do any of you remember getting "tan" using baby oil? I shudder at what I did to my skin, unable to undo the damage now. I read somewhere that 90% of your major skin damage is done before the age of eighteen. As a mother, I aim to prevent any skin damage on my kids.

A healthy tan is an oxymoron, emphasis on moron. Tans are not good for the skin. It damages it. We think we look better, because we have been taught by advertisers that to tan is to look healthy and relaxed, like you live the good life.

The statistics on the rising occurance of melanoma in people in their twenties is staggering. Tanning beds are the main culprit, but the young attitude of "it can't hapen to me" is also a part of the growth of melanoma in this age group.

As parents, how can we prevent this?

By first and foremost, applying sunscreen often and properly. You need to apply it at least 30 minutes before sun exposure.

Wear a hat to keep the scalp from burning.

Stay indoors between 10:00 AM and 3:00 PM, the worst time for sun exposure. If you must be outside, wear sunscreen, reapplying liberally.

Even though a sunscreen claims to be waterproof, reapply over and over.

Have your sons wear shirts or rashguards in the pool.

Teach your children about the harmful effects of the sun at a young age.

Do not drive your teens to the tanning beds. Ground them if they go to one. Seriously.

My daddy was 57 when he died. My kids never knew their grandfather.

All because of overexposure to the sun.

They did not know about sun damage then, but we know now.

I love you, Daddy, and miss you terribly. xoxox

Oh My Blog Award-The Soundtrack of My Youth

2010-06-28T05:00:00.000-07:00

I grew up in Queens, New York from 1964-1975. We moved because my brother and I were getting too old to share a bedroom. There were new apartments built across the street with three bedrooms, but they cost as much a month for rent as did a mortgage payment. So my parents moved us to the burbs of NYC in Rockland County.

I would not trade my years in the concrete jungle for all of the clothes I could squeeze into my walk-in closet. My childhood was one of freedom, of no cares, of a life of innocence. If you have ever watched the PBS show Arthur, that was my childhood. Walking alone to the candy store, getting an ice cream at Baskin Robbins, going out for pizza with friends, walking to school with my friends, walking to the library alone...freedom and no cares.

We did not worry about abduction, child molesters...and my mom did not have to live her life around endless activities or playdate pick-ups. After school, we got our bikes and rode. We went to the playground and played. There was no endless list of karate, dance, piano, and sports practice. We just kocked on our friends' doors and went out to play.

And guess what? My brother and I grew up fine. We went to college and became successful and productive adults in our chosen careers and in our private lives.

Here are the songs that are the soundtrack of my carefree days growing up in Queens:

I Got a Brand New Pair of Roller Skates We used to roller skate in the playground next to my apartment building. Remember that you had to have a key?

The theme song to Gilligan's Island My friends and I used to play Gilligan's Island and fight over who had to be Mrs. Howell!

The theme to Zoom We were all big fans of the PBS show Zoom that debuted when we were in elementary school. Do you remember trying to figure out Fannie Doodles and how Bernadette did that funky hand cross? I remember when she finally taught us!

Schoolhouse Rock If you are a person over the age of forty, I bet you can sing the Premable of the Constitution. Schoolhouse Rock taught our generation about math, history, grammar and science in the form of a cartoon video. All pre-MTV (back when MTV actually played music videos) and very educational.

Anything by Cher The Sonny and Cher Show was a childhood favorite of mine. How I envied the girls with the straight long hair, while I was born with frizzy curly hair (no hair products for us girls were invented yet). Dark Lady, Gypsies, Tramps, and Thieves, Half Breed-all favorites.

Other songs from my Wonder Years childhood:

Billy, Don't be a Hero

Hooked on a Feeling

The Loco-motion

Kung Fu Fighting

Please Mr. Postman

Cat's in the Cradle (I actually saw Harry Chapin sing live when my brother and I won tickets to be on the New York children's television show Wonderama)

Anything from The Partirdge Family and The Brady Bunch Kids

Thank you to Linda Pressman ar Bar Mitzvahzilla, for this most prestigious award.

I'd like to pass this award on to:

Gen X Mom

Mom of the Perpetually Grounded

How to Be a Zen Mama

The rules of the Award are:

1. Get really excited that you got the coolest award EVER!

2. Choose ONE of the following options of accepting the OMB award:

(a) Get really drunk and blog for 15 minutes straight, or for as long as you can focus.

(b) Write about your most embarrassing moment.

(c) Write a “Soundtrack of your childhood” post.

(d) Make your next blog a ‘vlog’/video blog. Basically, you’re talking to the camera about whatever.

(e) Take a picture of yourself first thing in the morning, before you do anything else (hair, make up,

etc) and post it.

3. Pass the award on to at least three, but preferably more, awesome bloggers as yourself.

Don’t forget to tell them.

Things to Do with Your Kids this Summer-Free and Simple!

2010-06-25T05:00:00.000-07:00

There are two kinds of summer moms:

Those who send their kids to day camp and continue their voyage of sanity during the summer months.

Those who pretend that they just love being with their kids all summer while in public, but are secretly counting the days until school begins again. They start out loving the fact that their kids are home all day or part of the day, but that wears off sometime around week four when the kids get bored.

I have written a series of article on Infobarrel.com about low cost and free activities for your kids this summer.

In sum, I have written about where to find free and low cost movies, free bowling, free museums, free arts and crafts classes, free storytimes and a few other activities.

Here is the link:

http://www.infobarrel.com/Find_Free_and_Low_Cost_Activities_for_Your_Kids_This_Summer

On the side of the article are other articles I have written about summer fun.

My children will all be attending a Jewish day camp this summer. My fifteen year old is working there all summer, my twins will have their first adventure there for six weeks. Since my fifteen year old is in the same division, she will be able to keep an eye out on them, as well as her friends, who also work there.

All of my kids have stayed home with me, attending part-time camp each summer, until they were seven. I even worked in my twins' camp for a few years to get a discount. Nowadays, I work on the weekend to give them the gift of camp, a place where they can immeresed in a Jewish environment with (mostly) other Jewish kids, something that is very important to me.

I will still have over four weeks to have fun with my kids when they are at home. I am having surgery in July on my rotator cuff, and I intend to have a quick recovey. Having things to do when they are at home while I am recovering will be a blessing for us all!

Coming Back from Vacation

2010-06-24T05:00:00.000-07:00

My family and I just got back from a family vacation to Disney World with my mom and my brother. It was a fun trip and we made a lot of happy memories. Yes it was hot, and yes we are tired, but it was a great way to kick off our summer.

I am so happy that Blogger permitted me to schedule posts while I was away. I was very much unplugged! I promise to catch up with all of my favorite blogs when my ten thousand loads of laundry are done! This was the first trip I have taken with children that I chose not to do laundry. I do not know if I will try that again!

I have a lot of ideas for traveling made simple...after I catch up with everything!

Unplugging is Simple, Part Two

2010-06-23T06:00:00.000-07:00

Okay my fellow blogganistas, do you have a hard time gettng away from the computer?

I love writing my blog and my online content. It is such an interesting world out there! At times, I have found it a more interesting world than the one I live in.

Being home with my twins was a dream come true, but also very difficult. With three kids, no help, and an ill mother, I just wanted to escape from it all. Logging on to play games, check my email, or post to a message board was my escape. Just like afternoon soaps were the saving grace of moms in years gone by, the internet helps moms escape the daily monotony of chores, squabbling kids, and laundry.

But the difference is soap operas ended, the internet is always there.

How can you manage to esacpe the lure of the informatin highway?

By unplugging. My computer is turned off before my kids come home from school. The siren cannot lure me with it's promise of comments or new email if she is silent-black screened. It stays silent until bedtime, unless there is something that needs to be researched.

Is your computer coming between your kids and you? Do you unplug at certain times of the day?

Potato Chip Chicken is so Simple and Delicious!

2010-06-21T06:00:00.000-07:00

This recipe is one of my family's favorites! My twins love to take turns crushing the chips. This is very easy to make-you can prep it in the morning and just pop it in the oven when dinner rolls around! Serve with a salad or steamed veggie and you are ready to eat!

Ingredients

Chicken breasts (as many as you need to feed your family)

1 stick butter or parve margarine

Regular (not flavored) potato chips

*If you desire, you can pound the chicken breasts flat so they will cook faster.

Line a baking sheet with foil and spray some non-stick cooking spray onto it.

In a plastic bag, pour half of a bag of potato chips. Seal and crush by hand or with a rolling pin until the chips are fine. Pour onto a plate.

In the microwave, melt butter/margarine until it is liquid. Let cool for a few minutes.

Dip the breasts into the chips, then the margarine, then the chips again. Place on the baking sheet and cook at 350 for half an hour or more, depending on the thickness of the chips.

For added flavor, you can add Durkee onion rings to the chip mixture.

Choosing an Adoption Agency Made Simple

2010-06-17T05:00:00.000-07:00

Once you have decided to adopt a child, you need to find a reputable agency. I have written an article on Infobarrel that covers all of the bases for finding an agency.

We never considered using an adoption attorney. Over the years, whenever there was a horror story about an adoption gone wrong, it involved and attorney and not an accredited agency. This is not to state that all adoption lawyers are bad. I know a few people who used them successfully. We decided to use the agency that another family member had already used successfully. This is where our comfort level was.

Click here is the link for the article.

A List of Simple Questions to Ask Before Adopting

2010-06-16T05:00:00.000-07:00

Adoption, as I stated in my previous post, is a great way to grow your family. There are many questions your partner and you have to discuss before proceding with adoption. I wrote an article on Infobarrel.com about this:

http://www.infobarrel.com/Questions_You_Need_to_Discuss_Before_Adopting_A_Baby

When your partner and you decide to have a baby, there are questions you talk about, like will you be a stay-at-home mom, who stays home if the baby gets sick, do you need a bigger house, etc. Adopting a baby is a whole other ball game. There are a boatload of questions you need to discuss BEFORE you begin to find an adoption agency. My article discusses those questions.

You both must be on the same page with your answers before you begin adoption proceedings.

I hope you find it helpful.

Adoption is Not Simple, But Oh So Worth It!

2010-06-15T05:00:00.000-07:00

Over the past few weeks, I have read some very personal posts about my blogger friends and their fertility issues. I am impressed by their openess and honesty. When I went through my own infertility journey, I let those close to me in, but not anyone else. I just felt like such a failure as a woman. My body failed me on something that was so easy the first time, so natural to do.

After several years, I decided to get off the emotional roller coaster that was infertility treatments. My husband and I chose adoption to increase our family. Initially, my husband just wanted me to "take a break", but I was firm in my decision. I wanted a baby, not a pregnancy.

My husband did not have an aversion to adoption-both of us have family members who were adopted.  That was never an issue. It just took him longer to get used to the idea of my stopping treatments and to let the dream of another biological child die.

As I read the posts of other bloggers who have only one child and never considered adoption, I felt sad. Adoption is a beautiful way to grow your family.

I think that many people do not consider the adoption option because they do not know anyone who has gone through the process. They may have fears or prejudices about adoption. This is natural if you are not exposed to it.

I was blessed. My best friend from college was my guide. We were pregnant together back in 1995, but she miscarried and never became pregnant again. I gave birth to my daughter and never became pregnant again.

She was my shoulder to lean on, to cry on.  She held my hand and dried my tears. I knew that in long run, unlike infertility treatments, I WOULD get a baby. I just had to wait. And wait. It was a blessing to have someone who had gone through the adoption process (and was undergoing it again for a second child while I was going through it) who understood my feelings.

My friend adopted her second child nine months before my twins arrived. I remember getting her phone call as vividly as I remember my calling her. It's hard to remember who cried with joy more.

I do know how hard it is to give up the dream of another biological child. But dreams can change. And there is no rule that says you cannot stop trying to get pregnant while going through the adoption process.

I have written a few articles on infobarrel.com about adoption.

This one is about overcoming adoption fears:

http://www.infobarrel.com/Overcoming_Adoption_Fears

I will share the others in future posts.

Waldorf Salad is Simple!

2010-06-10T11:18:00.000-07:00

Here is an easy recipe for Waldorf Salad for the hot summer days ahead!

Ingredients

1/3 cup salad dressing-your choice
2 Tablespoons cream
3 cups diced apples
2 cups diced celery
1 cup pecans
1 cup seedless grapes, halved
lettuce

Thin the salad dressing with the cream. Combine all other ingredients and toss with the dressing. Serves 6.

Summer Reading for Kids Is Simple When There is A Reward!

2010-06-09T06:00:00.000-07:00

I love to read, always have. My oldest daughter is an avid reader, too. My twins love books. My husband? No, he does not enjoy reading. As a teacher, I feel his loss.

Getting your child to read over the summer is very important, especially if she or he has reading problems. By maintaining the reading muscle over the summer, your child does not lose the gains s/he made during the school year.

There are a few ways to get your child motivated.

Borders has a reading book club-read ten books and pick out a free one. The link is:

http://www.borders.com/online/store/MediaView_doubledogdare

Barnes and Noble also has it's own summer reading rewards program. Read eight books and get a free one. The linkis:

http://www.barnesandnobleinc.com/our_company/community/Summer_Reading/Summer_Reading_Program.html

If you have a TD Bank in your area and your child has a Young Savers Account (or you can open one once you earn the money), your child can read ten books and get ten dollars deposited to his or her account. The link is:

http://www.tdbank.com/summerreading/

Go to your local library and check out its summer reading program. Our library has incentives for the hours read, and then my kids can go for a prize. Last year, the good prizes ran out early, but my kids managed to earn Dunkin Donuts gift certificates and some plastic prizes. They were thrilled.

You can also create your own reading incentives at home. The reward should be whatever works best for your child.

The Pantry Challenge...It's Simple!

2010-06-07T06:00:00.000-07:00

About a year ago, I read America's Cheapest Family Gets You Right on the Money: Your Guide to Living Better, Spending Less, And Cashing in on Your Dreams by Annette Economides and her husband Steven Economides. They are a modern day Amy Dacyczyn from the 1990's Tightwad Gazette series of books.

Although I did not learn anything new about saving money, one strategy they used was to go food shopping once a month. Their theory was, if you shop, you will buy.

As a person who loves her fresh fruit and veggies, and so does my family, I could not live like this. I am blessed to have a produce outlet less than a mile from home, where I can get fresh fruits and vegetables for significantly less than at a grocery store-even a loss leader.

And milk, while it can be frozen from what I have read, is not something I am interested in freezing.

But as a practitioner of stockpiling, i.e., I bulk buy sales as they cycle, I always have plenty in the house. There are weeks I buy nothing but fresh fruit and milk and challenge myself to eat only from the freezer and pantry.

So this week I am challenging myself again.

My menu started Sunday with breaded chicken breasts, rice cooked in broth, and frozen peas. Tonight is meatballs that were frozen from my last double batch. Tuesday is beef stew, cubed leftover London Broil that will be cooked in the crock pot with veggies. Wednesday will be fish-salmon patties and trout that my husband caught on his fishing trip last month. Thursday I will serve pasta with fresh vegetables.

Friday will not be our traditional Sabbath chicken, but pizza or chicken nuggets. My husband and I are attending a service at our synagogue celebrating members of eighteen years or more. My kids are staying home. I will even be speaking on the bimah before the congregation!

Can you take part in the pantry challenge this week or next? What will you serve?

Family is Not Simple, Part 2

2010-06-03T06:00:00.000-07:00

Two weeks ago I wrote about attending a family wedding. For weeks it was stressful just thinking about going. I did appreciate the thoughtful comments.

Going to the wedding was difficult, but I am glad I went.

We can chose our friends but not our family, the saying goes. As I reached out with greetings to those I had not seen in years, some behaved as they had in the past, cold and distant, Others were warm and friendly. Still others had a friendly greeting and then ignored us for the rest of the evening.

So be it.

My husband and I have moved on. I am blessed to have the family that I do, although smaller than in years past. My children have unconditional love from those who truly care.

Can anyone ask for anything more?

Keeping Your Marriage Strong-What We Can Learn from the Gores

2010-06-02T06:19:00.000-07:00

I was planning a series on keeping you marriage strong in the upcoming weeks, but the news of Al and Tipper Gore's impending divorce got me started early.

I wrote an in depth article about it on Infobarrel. To sum it up, it appears that while there was no major force, aka an affair, that rocked their world, they simply grew apart. Interests other than each other drove them to separate after forty years of marriage.

My husband and I do not get to do much together by ourselves. It bothers both of us, and we do speak about it, which helps the other to know that we are not alone in our feelings. We occasionally will just be together in the same room trying to watch a movie or program, but invariably, some small person will interupt.

Because of the economy, my husband no longer is allowed overtime. Instead, he comps his time by taking Friday off. We have enjoyed our Fridays together when they happen.

What do you do together with your spouse? If you do nothing, why is that? Does it bother you?

Pasta Salad

2010-06-01T06:00:00.000-07:00

With the weather warming up, you want a dinner that is quick and easy. Pasta salad is a great cold dish that you can prepare in the morning and just pull it out of the refirgerator to eat at night. Serve with a fruit salad.

Ingredients

1 box Rotelle pasta, cooked and drained (or less, depending on your size family)

1 head broccoli

1 can pitted olives, drained

1 can tuna, drained and flaked

cherry tomatoes

Italian dressing

Combine all ingredients in a bowl and toss. Pour on dressing and toss again. Cover and chill in the refirgerator until ready to serve.

Happy Memorial Day

2010-05-31T06:00:00.000-07:00

I hope you are all enjoying the long weekend. If you are checking in, I just wanted to remind you that while it is always a pleasure to have an extra day off from work, take a minute to remember why we are off today.

Why Did You Pick Up the Phone?

2010-05-26T06:00:00.000-07:00

At some point in Psychology 101, you learn about Pavlov's dogs and the theory of classical conditioning. The dogs were conditioned to salivate whenever they heard the sound of a bell.

Why is it that people feel compelled to answer a phone given today's technology? There is Caller ID. You can instantly decide if you want to speak to that person or not.

If you do not have Caller ID, then there is the answering machine to screen calls. Once you hear the person's voice, you can again decide whether or not you wish to speak to him or her. There is also voicemail.

So why is it that people still pick up the phone when it is not a good time to speak? Are we Pavlonian?

My mom always answers the phone, even if it is a bad time. Her favorite show is Jeopardy, and invariably the phone rings around Final Jeopardy time. She tells me she is annoyed by the interruption, but STILL answers the phone. I ask her why doe she pick it up? With no logical answer, I believe it is generational. You always picked up the phone before technology allowed you to screen calls.

There are times when I call people and I can hear the annoyance or distraction in their voices. I will ask if this is a bad time, and they will say yes. So why did you pick up the phone? I'll leave a message. This makes me feel badly (not terribly, but you know what I mean). Why are you so huffy at me? WHo made up pick up the phone?

I feel the same way with the cell phone. In my last post about "Unplugging" I wrote about how I ended budding friendships over the cell phone and how annoyed I got that people picked up and spoke to friends in my house on my time. I honestly do not know why these women picked up the phone and did not think of it as being rude.

So the next time the phone rings, and it is a bad time, think about WHY you are picking it up. It's really simple not to!

Making My Blogging More Simple

2010-05-24T06:00:00.000-07:00

When I first dipped my toes into the world of blogging, it was with my Girl Scout blog. I wanted to share what I was doing, as each time I went to a local Leader meeting, there was a sense of frustration among the Daisy leaders. We were given no help after we signed up. Many women were simply not enjoying the scouting trip with their girls.

Then I had the idea for this blog. I keep it simple by only posting twice a week, sometimes three times. My other life commitments do not permit me to post more often. Besides, it goes against my philosphy!

Because two blogs were not enough (insert sarcasm), I started my What's for Dinner blog. While I initially enjoyed writing it, it soon became more of a chore. I decided not to post daily, and then eventually, I stopped posting at all.

I have made the decision to keep it simple and discontinue that blog. Instead, I will post simple recipes here. I am not a gourmet cook by any means, but what I do cook is healthy (most of the time), quick, and my family enjoys it.

My load feels lighter already.

Family is Not Simple

2010-05-20T13:59:00.000-07:00

On Saturday evening, my husband and I are attending the wedding of a niece we have not seen in over four years. My DH and I had no choice but to cut off ties from most of his family. The stories are not important-they are in the past and shall stay there. But the decison we made to leave, so to speak, was not without heavy hearts.

The wedding invitation was a pleasant surprise. Dear auntie and uncle have not been totally forgotten. While our children are not invited, we managed to get my mom to watch them and pray she is having a good day.

I colored my hair, got a pedi, and even shed a few pounds.

It will be an interesting evening.

Wish me good luck!

Mornings Made Simple

2010-05-19T06:00:00.000-07:00

Have you ever had a morning when it seemed all forces were against you? You overslept, the kids would not cooperate, the kids are melting down about what to wear, and no one told you there was no bread left to make sandwiches for lunch?

Let's face it, we have all been there. But there are things we can do as moms to make our mornings run more smoothly.

It all begins the night before.

As a child in the 1970's, my mom went back to work as she disliked being home all day. She missed teaching. My Nana, her mom, went back to work in 1941 because my Papa's grocery business had failed.

My routines with my own children are shaped by these two women. When I worked full time when my oldest daughter was born, we had time for hugs and snuggles under the cover because everything was ready to go.

I also have never had any help. My husband leaves for work at 6:45. With no backup, it is all on me. I had to make my mornings as easy as possible. Who wants to start their day stressed and strained?

Every night, I pack my children's lunchboxes with snacks. They do not like cold bread, so I make their sandwiches in the morning. Luckily for me, they eat the same boring sandwich every day, so it really takes me under two minutes to do.

I make coffee in the coffeemaker, so when I stumble downstairs at 5:40 I just have to turn it on. My children have their clothing set out (along with underwear and socks) and ready to put on, and so do I. Backpacks are put back in the closet, zipped up with all homework done and papers signed and ready to be returned to their teachers. Shoes (should) be in the shoe bin by the front door, ready to be placed on their feet. Jackets are put back in the closet and are ready to be taken out.

This whole process takes only a few minutes each night, but oh, how it makes the morning easier. (Notice I did not say EASY, but easier) I have a rule that if you are not dressed to the socks, you do not get breakfast. My youngest daughter always had sock issues, and it was making me late. So I told her that socks had to be on the feet before she eats. That one little step eliminated the dreaded sock time and got us back on schedule.

In order to get my kids into a routine, I made a picture chart back when they were four. I worked in their preschool, and had to get there on time to prep for my class. I made a chart with stars on it. For every five stars, they got a reward. Eventually, I eliminated the chart and the routine became part of our everyday lives.

Children thrive on routine. They tend to behave better when they know what to expect. Moms thrive on calm mornings.

What kind of routines do you have in the morning?

Bad Phone Etiquette

2010-05-17T06:00:00.000-07:00

Back in the old days (pre-1980 or so) if no one was home and the telephone rang, we never knew if anyone called, as there was no answering machine. No one could get angry with us for not getting back to them, because we did not know they were trying to get ahold of us!

Also, no one could get upset about our not picking up the phone, since we were not intentionally screening calls. There was no Caller ID. There was no *69 to see who was crank calling us. There was no "Calll Waiting" to see who else wanted our attention.

The telephone was a lot simpler back then.

I know it is a minor thing, but I do get annoyed when people do certain phone habits.

I am not a fan of "Call Waiting". In fact, a girlfriend of mine renamed it "Call Someone Better" twenty years ago when a mutual friend of ours would ALWAYS cut into our long distance conversations when someone else buzzed in. This was back in the day when long distance was paid by the minute, so it cost me money when I was "on hold" for a few minutes.

In fact, I ended our friendship over Call Waiting. I remember the last time we spoke. I had just received a birthday party invitation to her daughter's first birthday party. Although it was in New York two hours away, we would have attended, but I was having my daughter's third birthday party that same day.

This is the converstation:

"Hi Tina (made up name)"

"Hi Mommy, mommy,mommy! How are you?"

"Great! Listen I just got the invitation to your daughter's party and.. (clicking sound)

"Hold on a minute," (Click) Wait, wait and wait some more until she comes back on.

"Hi, I'm back. I have to go now."

"As I was saying, we cannot go to the party because we are having my daughter's party that day."

"Sorry about that. Talk to you soon. Bye."

That was in 1998. I sent a gift and did not ever speak to her on the phone since then.

While I do have Call Waiting with Caller ID, it was not my choice. The service came with my phone package. It is useful to know WHO is buzzing in, but I only interrupt the call if it is my husband, mother, or children's school. And that is rare for any of that to happen.

People who know me well know that I hang up on them if they Call Wait me for someone other than a spouse, child, or parent. If someone else is better than I am, then I guess I do not need you either.

Unless it is an emergency, stay in the moment with the friend with whom you are speaking.

Time Flies

2010-05-13T05:52:00.000-07:00

My "baby", my first born daughter, is fifteen today. Life was so much simpler back in 1995. No internet, no cell phones (only rich people had those)...daily life had very few interruptions.

But in some ways, at least for me, life was more complicated than it was for my friends who gave birth at the same time.

My dad was dying from melanoma when she was born. After having been cancer-free for three years, it had returned in my seventh month of pregnancy.

He died seven weeks after her birth.

That event changed who I was forever. When my daddy died, my life became was one big fog. I stumbled from day to day, but kept on going, because that my sweet baby girl needed me. It was the only reason to get up in the morning. I had no time to mourn, someone else depended on me.

My husband, in order to advance his career and earn more money for his growing family, took a job 1.5 hours away. He was gone about seventy hours a week.

The two most important men in my life abandoned me at the same time. My mom, who lived two hours away, was mired in her own grief. I had no one. I was truly on my own to parent my daughter. I did the best I could.

As I reflect upon the day she was born, I wish I could tell my new mommy self that it would all be okay. We worry so much, and that even with some of the mistakes I made, she still turned out fine, thank G-d.

Tonight we will dine on Italian food, eat a birthday chocolate chip muffin (her choice) and sing to my beautiful girl. I will remember the baby girl whose very birth was a reminder that the circle of life goes on and on, and that my father still lives on in her.

And my Nana, who died this August and shared a birthday with my daughter, is being missed on what would have been her 98th birthday. I am sure she is telling my father all about his three grandkids today, especially her birthday twin.

I miss you both.

Unplugging is Simple, Part One

2010-05-05T06:00:00.000-07:00

These scenes are all too typical.

Mom in ponytail, visor and yoga pants has a cell phone to her ear and a preschooler holding her hand while walking into a store or preschool.
Mom is pushing the child on the swing with one hand, talking on the phone the next.
Mom is pushing a cart in the supermarket and ignoring her child or children while chatting on the phone.
Mom pulls out of the preschool parking lot and instead of asking her child about her day, she is yapping on the phone to someone who is not there.
Kids get into the car after school or practice and instead of asking how their day was, mom is on the phone.

Is there something wrong here?

Permit me to step upon my soapbox. WHAT ARE YOU THINKING?

I am singling out mothers for this post because while fathers do the same thing, it is more than likely for business and not to make a coffee date or gossip. What fathers do is wrong, too, but this post is not about them.

We have raised a generation of people who have been taught that the person who is not there is more important than the one who is, namely, them.

Have you ever seen a bunch of tweens and teens hanging out and walking together? They are on the phone, talking or texting, ignoring the friends they are with! No one seems to enjoy the people with whom they chose to spend their time. Many of these children probably learned this in the backseat of their mother's car.

When I go out with friends, I make comments when they are picking up calls and talking on my time. Aren't I good enough?

I stopped budding friendships with two women because of this behavior. Early on in a friendship, I will invite people to come to my home to hang out with the kids. Both of these women spent time talking on the phone to other women, while IN MY HOME. How insulting! And these were not short calls, either.

It was the last time both came over.

I think cell phones are a good thing. They are great for emergencies of any kind. Hey, I would not have my twins if I did not have a cell phone! My husband had gotten a phone call from our adoption agency, and he had to contact me about it, as I was at the supermarket. We had to give them an answer that day if we wanted to adopt them! No phone, no babies!

But enough with ignoring the cashier at the supemarket. Enough chatting on the phone while driving (very dangerous). Enough with the loud conversations in the restaurant.

And enough with ignoring your kids.

No one needs to be accesible 24/7.

Unplug the phone and rejoin the world and the people you are with.

It's that simple.

Blog Comments Made Simple

2010-05-03T06:00:00.000-07:00

When I began blogging, I was so excited to not only get followers, but to read their comments, too. It was thrilling to know that not only was someone reading what I had to say, but they also liked it (or not) enough to respond.

Let's face it, comments make our day. It shows that we have touched someone and that there are people who actually look forward to reading our thoughts.

I know that a lot of us have many blogs that we follow, and some more regularly than others. I'm not 100% sure, but I believe I follow every frugalista blog I have found on the Friday Follow. I am indebted to these women who take the time to find the freebies and bargains for me. I love all of cool stuff that comes into my mailbox each week!

There are a limited number of freebies and coupon match-ups available each day. When I am able to get the deal, I ALWAYS leave a comment! It's typically a simple "Thank you for finding this!". I truly am! Someone has gone to the hard work and effort to find this for me, and I want her to know that her work is not in vain. Because there are so many repeats, whoever gets it to my attention first gets the comment for that product.

Do you take the time and leave a comment? If not, you should. And if you don't, why not? (although, since you do not comment, I won't know why!)

Volunteering Made Simple, Part Two-What is Holding You Back?

2010-04-28T09:12:00.000-07:00

Volunteering is for everyone, especially for those of us who are mothers at home and have children in school all day. In this economy, if you are still fortunate enough to create your own day because you are not punching the proverbial clock, then you have no excuse not to help. There are so many worthwhile organizations that would love to have you for one hour a week, or even one hour a month.

As both a teacher and a parent, I feel that your child's school PTA is one of the most important places for you to get involved. Your children spend more time in school than with you, so making school a great place to be is in everyone's best interest.

Speaking from both sides of the fence, I have seen children delight in seeing their mom (yes an occasional dad volunteers, but that is so rare!) during the day. I love getting extra hugs and kisses from my kids. Even their friends feel special when they see me and give me a wave or a hug.

Is there something holding you back from helping? Here are some ways to overcome it.

Use your Power of No. I was recently asked to be the chairperson of a PTA committee. I thanked the person for the honor of thinking of me, but I said no. I do not wish to head a committee, but am always able to help out whenever I am available.

Get over feeling high schoolish. One involved PTA mom said that another mom told her she did not want to get involved because the PTA seemed so "cliquey". She was annoyed because she told her that it only appeared to be cliquey because it is the same moms over and over who are doing everything! I personally go out of my way to introduce myself and say hello to a new face. Go to a PTA meeting, introduce yourself to the board and some others who are sitting there. You will make new friends this way.

Remember that as a volunteer, you work how you help around your schedule. Some people are afraid to volunteer becuse they think they might get sucked in for more time than they want to commit. Or they feel that "what is one hour going to do to help?"

Maybe you cannot do the school carnival, but you can help with the bake sale. If you have younger kids, maye a friend can watch them while you go to school and volunteer and you recipricate the favor for her the next time.

There are different ways to volunteer. If you cannot attend a class party, send in a special snack. If you have no one to watch the kids, ask the PTA what you can do from home to be of service. Can you do the newsletter? Be an email contact?

These guidelines can work for any organization.

What if you work full time and want to spend your evening with the kids and husband? I get that. Can you take an hour or two off from work to go to school to help? Can you help at an evening function? Our school has several family functions on Fridays throughout the year. I volunteer for part of it and spend the rest of the time with my husband and kids. Everyone wins.

Can you coach your son or daughter's team? Work the snack stand? Find an organization for the whole family to volunteer to on the weekend? Doing good and family time...win-win for everyone!

Volunteering Made Simple, Part One

2010-04-27T09:00:00.000-07:00

When I was an elementary school teacher, I saw moms who were at my school all of the time, giving of themselves. These active members of the PTA (Parent Teacher Association) were the lifeblood to making things happen in our school. Cultural events, teacher luncheons, science expos, field trips...they did it all for us and for the kids.

As a member of my synagogue for almost twenty years, I have seen the same names over and over in different volunteer positions and committee chairs. Their dedication to my house of worship is invaluable.

I have been a Daisy Girl Scout Leader for the past two years. The women who head our service unit give so much of their time, and are truly dedicated to the Girl Scout movement.

I did not grow up with parents who were volunteers, so I had no personal role model for being one. But as a mother who is blessed to be home, I feel it is my duty to give my time to volunteer.

My first forays into volunteering was as my oldest daughter's field trip mommy. I worked full-time until she was seven, so I saved my personal days for events such as this (and her teachers did not mind a veteran teacher along on the trip with them). I had a blast on the hayride with my daughter and her friends.

My next field trip was to a museum, and I had my daughter and her closest friends in my group. Again, we had so much fun.

When I couldn't attend a class party, I was a "send-in" mom, i.e., I sent in a needed item, such as cupcakes. My daughter was so happy to have me participate in some way, even if I physically could not be there.

After our twins arrived and I was no longer working full-time for pay, I was unable to attend school functions to volunteer, as I had no one to watch my babies. When my mom retired and moved down here to live near us, she would watch them once a school year so I could do a party.

I was able to be there for my daughter on on a regualr basis for her weekend youth group events, since my husband was home to take care of our twins.

Do you volunteer? What causes are dear to you? How can you help them?

Make the Call

2010-04-26T06:58:00.000-07:00

In the every day busy-ness of our lives, we tend to get caught up in the daily chores of life. We see people who are a part of this busy-ness, but how often do you see others that are not a part of this world?

What about your dear friend who moved ten minutes away to the next town? Now that the kids are in different schools, you have lost the daily chit- chat and venting sessions that you once took for granted.

How is your aunt who retired to Florida? Have you played phone tag and just gave up?

Did you hear that someone's husband is ill? Are you avoiding the call and that conversation? Maybe she needs a hand with the kids or a meal delivered. Did you call to ask?

Your friend's father died three months ago. Have you seen her since the funeral? Have you called to see how she is doing or how you can help?

Is there someone with whom you once shared a close friendship, but life's busy-ness has prevented you from speaking?

My beloved Nana called me all the time. Depending on when she called (kids in school or at home) I always made time to speak to her, but the length of time would vary. She lived an hour away, and I visited her with the kids at least once a month to visit, but she always ended our calls by saying, "Thank you for the visit." We were very close, and her phone visits to me were the highlight of my day. She understood me like no one else did.

Is there someone you can visit by phone that would make both of your day?

Pick up the phone. It's that simple.

Make Your Uniform Simple

2010-04-23T06:00:00.000-07:00

There are many jobs that require uniforms so that others can identify who the employees are.

The first job that I ever had a uniform for was when I was a Pampered Chef consultant. I worked full-time and came home and was out the door for my show an hour or so later. I had to feed my daughter, get her to a neighbor's house so she would be taken care of until my husband came home, and load up my car. I did not have time to think about what I was wearing.

So I made myself uniform. Black pants and white shirt. A no-brainer crisp, professional look. I always felt good and confident wearing that outfit.

I have a simple uniform for my Hebrew School teacher job on the weekend. Black pants, shirt, and black sweater in case the heat is not turned on. Again, I look professional, yet I am also very comfortable.

My mommy uniform is different. I wear not-mom jeans, a funky top, and my favorite black shoes. I feel dressed and confident as I leave the house each day. No matter what I am doing or where I am going, if I run into someone I have not seen in a while, I feel that I look fine.

And I do not stress about what I am going to wear each day.

Do you have a uniform or something that makes you feel great when you wear it?

Doing Something for Yourself Made Simple

2010-04-22T06:25:00.000-07:00

Recently, I wrote a post about doing one thing for yourself that brings you joy. Doing something for yourself ties in with that.

Make yourself a list of things that you would like to do, but you always tell yourself that you do not have the time. The kids, the house, your spouse always seem to come first. ENOUGH!

Put this list in a visible place. On your calendar, write in what you want to do and schedule it the way you schedule your child's dentist appointment. Remember, you have to give to yourself as well as your family, or else there won't be much left to give.

Getting Discounts on Amusement Tickets Made Easy

2010-04-20T06:17:00.000-07:00

If your children are bugging you to go to an amusement park but you feel the price it out of reach, I have some simple tips for you to follow to get discount tickets.

Each place has it's own tips and tricks to getting discounts. I have done the work for you so it is really simple to get discount tickets to some of America's favorite amusement park destinations. Just read and save!

Hershey Park

Sesame Place

Six Flags

Walt Disney World

Daycations:Planning a Local Family Trip Made Simple

2010-04-19T06:06:00.000-07:00

With spring in full swing, weekends are no longer spent indoors. Days of fun in the sun are on eveyone's agenda. However, if you are on a budget, traveling to exotic locales for a long weekend may not be possible.

This is where the day trip, or "daycation" comes into play. A daycation is traveling one to two hours away from your home and having some family fun without breaking the bank.

To make the most of your daycation, you will need to plan. Read my article on infobarrel for step by step instructions on how to make a lifetime of memories in one day.

Family fun is really that simple!

My Second Blog Award!

2010-04-14T18:52:00.000-07:00

I just got finished doing something that gives me joy-watching The Middle and Modern Family on ABC and decided to check my email before heading to bed. Lo and behold, my friend Aging Mommy gave me The Circle of Friends blog award! This award is intended to bring a reminder of friendship at those tough times in life when it is most needed.

I am so deeply touched by this recognition. My intention for this blog is to help women stop the nonsense that we have somehow permitted ourselves to fall into. Why is it that we make everything so difficult for ourselves, and in turn, make it difficult for others?

We deserve time alone. We deserve to have people there for us instead of us always being there for others. We deserve to laugh and cry. We deserve to be left alone when we go to the bathroom, for goodness sake!

Thank you again, Aging Mommy.

Blessing Others Made Simple

2010-04-14T06:07:00.000-07:00

Blessing someone is related to doing favors for someone. You are doing something for someone, and expecting nothing in return.

There are many ways to bless someone.

Every new season, my dear friend comes by with bags of clothing for my son. And this is not just any clothing, it is all top shelf designer stuff. She could consign it or sell it, but that is not her way. She saves it all for my son. To date, I have never bought my son a winter coat!

I pay this favor forward by blessing my friend with my son's clothes. Once a year, we visit in her upstate New York, and I have several bags of clothing for her.

Do you have a friend whom you could bless with something that is needed?

Doing Favors Made Simple

2010-04-12T06:07:00.000-07:00

My parents were very independent people, and relied on each other to get things done. Neither one of them liked to ask anybody for a favor.

One day, my mom was walking to the car repair shop, about a mile from our house. She loved to walk, so she did not mind it.

A friend of hers who lived nearby saw her walking, and when she found out what she was doing, she offered a ride to my mom and was upset that she was not asked to drive her there.

Their way of doing things rubbed off on me. It wasn't until my twins were born that I needed to ask people favors. I really disliked doing it. If someone offered to help, I was so grateful, but never did I want to appear needy or unable to complete or do a job.

And then, after a while, I just got annoyed asking for favors and stopped.

Why?

Because my favors were never for myself, they were for my daughter, who is 7.5 years older than her siblings. If she needed a ride home at 4:30 after a Girl Scout meeting one week, then she would need them the rest of the weeks. Instead of one of the people I asked OFFERING to take my daughter home after each meeting, I would have to call and ask. Over and over. Week after week.

I should mention that all of the scouts lived in my neighborhood, some even living on my street! So taking my daughter home was in no way going out of their way.

The others did not consider my situation at all. After all, their kids were older and they were past this stage of life. Week after week, my situation did not change-I STILL had two little ones to take out at the witching hour every week. When it was really bad weather, I would see another parent going into the school and ask them to take my daughter out so I did not have to get my kids out of the car seat again.

What a blessing it would have been to have ONE person say, "Mommy x 3, I will take your daughter home for you. No need to drag the little ones out."

Since my husband was rarely home in those days, and I did not want my older daughter to be resentful of her siblings, I took them out (or dragged, depending on the time) to practices. People would marvel at how I 'Did it all with no help." Well, did you offer to take my daughter to the practice? After all, you DRIVE BY my house to get to the field!

I just got tired of asking. Never did I ask for anything big or out of the way. A simple ride, since you were going to be there anyway.

And it finally dawned on me why my parents did not bother to ask others for help.

I wrote this article to raise your awareness of others in your life. Can you be doing someone a favor, something so simple, that you cannot even see how much a blessing it would be to the other person?

Happy Friday Follow

2010-04-08T21:15:00.001-07:00

Welcome back friends and hello new ones! My blog is about slowing down and enjoying the life we have been given. I will look at all of your blogs this week!

Showing Sympathy Made Simple

2010-04-08T06:30:00.000-07:00

As I write this post, I am still overcome with a sense of sadness. Tonight I went ot pay a shiva call at the home of one of my children's preschool teachers. Her husband was young and had been battling cancer for over two years.

In the Jewish religion, shiva is the period of mourning. During the first week of shiva, the home of the mourners receives guests and a special service is said each evening. This is so the newly bereaved is not left alone, stinging in the pain of grief. To pay a shiva call is a great mitzvah, or good deed.

Paying ones respects right after someone dies is easy, but not something everyone is comfortable with. To that, I say GROW UP and get over it! No matter how uncomfrotable you are with your feelings about death, it is NOTHING compared to those awash with the newness of grief.

You need to put on your big girl panties and help the mourners. That means going to the funeral, the wake, the viewing, the shiva house, sending a meal, making a donation, making a call, sending a card and doing anything the mourners need to get done.

And no, an email or text expressing sympathy is really not sufficient.

If you do not do any of these, relationships change and/or end. I know. When my dad died, seven weeks after the birth of my first daughter, a group of women I thought were my friends ignored his death. No calls, cards, NOTHING! After another woman in the group, who had done many of the things I had mentioned, found out they others did nothing, she read them the riot act.

Then they called...three weeks later. I gave them a piece of my mind and ended our friendships. Fifteen years later, I can speak to them without a problem, as I see them regularly at synagogue and we have children who are friends. But we are not friends.

In the months that follow a death, when everyone else goes back to their regular life, life is still hard for mourners. Forming a new "normal" is difficult.

How can you help?

Call. Talk. Listen. Just be there to help pick up the pieces.

It's really that simple.

Do One Thing Each Day That Brings You Joy

2010-04-07T06:30:00.000-07:00

For many of us, the days go by in a blur. Get up, get the kids off to school, get ourselves to work or off to do chores and errands, get the kids, make dinner, do homework, bath, bedtime...where do our days go?

Think about it. Did you do ONE THING today that gave you complete and utter joy?

I am not talking about an ordinary feeling. I am talking about doing something for YOURSELF that after you did it, it made the rest of your day better.

Sometimes it is hard to remember the things that bring us joy. Sure, our kids do. But that is not about you.

Reading a good book on a lounge chair in my backyard brings me joy. Seeing certain people brings me joy. Having quiet time brings me joy.

Do I get to do these things every day? No. And I should. I deserve to.

And so do you.

Can you think of a few things that you do for yourself that bring you joy? What are they?

Remembering Birthdays Made Simple

2010-04-06T06:53:00.000-07:00

Have you ever forgotten a friend or relative's birthday? And when you remember that you forgot it, you get that sinking feeling in the pit of your stomach?

It is hard not to feel guilty about missing birthdays. They come once a year, and you really cannot make up for forgetting about it. Sure, they make adorable "Forgive me for forgetting your birthday" cards, but who really enjoys receiving those?

I have developed a system to remember birthdays that is really simple.

I am old fashioned. I have a big calendar and at the end of every year, I transfer everyone's birthdays and anniversaries onto the new calendar.

I have different types of cards to send. As a teacher, I have been given beautiful stationary that I use as greeting cards. I also pick up blank clearance cards at Target, as well as buying generic birthday cards from the Dollar Store. Another great buy are the packaged birthday cards from Walgreens, Not cheesy like days gone by, but cute. You get ten to a box for $1.50.

I also have a Hallmark Greeting Card program on my computer if I feel like making a photocard for special people or if I need one for a specific kind of birthday, like Sweet 16 or 40th.

Here's where the organization and simplicity kick in. During a quiet time, I take out my calendar and my cards and do three-four months worth at a time. I address the envelopes, place a return address label on it, and in the lower left corner, I put the birthday (example-7/12). I do not seal it, in case I want to include some recent photos of the kids. I only put on the stamp when I physically an going to mail the card.

I place the envelopes in my bill clip area and send them out when they are "due".

Having to do this chore 3-4 times a year saves me time and I do not forget birthdays. It also permits me to send cards out early, in case we are going to be away.

Do you have a way to make remembering birthdays more simple?

Lipstick Made Simple

2010-04-05T06:30:00.000-07:00

My father made his living in the cosmetics industry from the mid 1960's until his death in 1995. Growing up, he always told me that all make-up is the same. What women were paying for when purchasing high end cosmetics was the multi-million dollar celebrity endorsement, the pretty packaging and the advertising. Basically, there are only so many ways to make a lipstick.

Fast forward to 2010. I know many women who pay hundreds and hundreds of dollars to have their make-up "done", while I still buy my make-up in Walmart, CVS or Walgreens. I still hear my daddy's voice in my head whenever I buy a new cosmetic.

I love to wear lipstick. It makes my face look dressed. The only thing I never liked about it is the reapplying. I tried various all-day lipsticks, and they made my lips feel dry.

Last week, I discovered a new lip product from Cover Girl-Outlast All Day Lip Cover. It was on sale at CVS, plus I had a manufacturer's coupon and three dollars in Extra Bucks were returned to me for the purchase. I bought one in the color Plum Berry.

Ladies, can I tell you, it lasted all day and night! Not one reapply! How simple is putting lipstick on in the morning and then forgetting about it until make-up removal time?

I am a big fan and cannot wait to buy more.

*Please not that this is my experience and I was in no way given the lipstick or reimbursed for my opinion.

Friday Follow #12!

2010-04-01T21:04:00.000-07:00

TGIF! It's time for the Friday Follow!

Spring Break Made Simple

2010-04-01T08:05:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow my children begin their spring break. Due to the snow days, my high schooler only has Friday and Monday off. My first grade twins will be off for over a week.

What will we do without going crazy or spending money?

On Friday my husband will be home, so we will enjoy the outdoors and work on our garden. The rest of the weekend will take care of itself with our normal activities.

With my teen off on Monday, I hope that she will make some plans with her friends so she won't mope about her short break.

That leaves me with my twins. I am planning on getting together with friends and their kids that, due to being in different schools and having after school activities on different days, we do not see as often as we would like.

My mom, who is not up to watching them for more than a few hours, said I could drop them off for some of that special "grandma time" my children adore. We may also go out to lunch on another day.

Trips to parks we have not seen since summer will also be on the schedule if the weather permits.

I'm planning on a trip to the library to get some DVDs and books will keep us busy for free.

And what inspired today's post was cleaning out the laundry room this morning. I have a large laundry room, and have several shelves of arts and crafts materials for my twins. I needed to tame this area and have been tossing and organizing various items. My kids love crafts, and they were inundated with craft kits and materials during their fall birthdays.

I found untouched and unopened craft kits! I placed them all in a bag and will have "craft time with mommy" during the day. I love found treasures!

Spring break will be a welcome time of relaxing and not living on a school schedule. Planning will make the time go by happily and enjoyably.

My First Blog Award!

2010-03-31T10:04:00.000-07:00

Thank you to Christie Cottage for giving me my very first blog award! And so perfect for me, too-the Sunshine Award!. We women simply work too hard and are so hard on ourselves. My goal is to help lighten your load as I also try to keep my life as simple as possible. I read so many blogs from women who call it "chaos", "stressful" and other words that are not happy.

I know chaos. I have kids-two of whom are a set of twins who have given me a run for my money. And my sweet older daughter is a teenager-that says it all.

I try to spin things on the positive side. And if I cannot, I try to say over and over, "this, too, shall pass."

Here are twelve blogs that I am giving the Sunshine Award to. I enjoy reading them and find them ever so helpful!

This award is given to bloggers

whose positivity and creativity inspires

others in the blog world.

The rules for accepting the award are:

1. Put the logo on your blog or within your post. √

2. Pass the award to 12 bloggers. √

3. Link the nominies within your post. √

4. Let Them know they received this award by commenting on their blog. √

5. Share the love and link to the person from whom you received this award. √

Aging Mommy

http://agingmommyblog.blogspot.com/

Thoughts on being a middle aged mom and a first time SAHM at age 46. Being 45, I can relate.

Generation X Mom

http://www.thegenerationxmomblog.com

Thought provoking posts about life as a mom in today's world. I love her topics!

Help in a Handbag

http://helpinahandbag.blogspot.com/

Raising a teenage daughter as a single mom, working and getting through it all. Again, I can relate!

Menopausal New Mom

http://menonewmom.blogspot.com

The title says it all! I love reading her posts.

The Floundering SAHM

http://theflounderingsahm.blogspot.com

Tina's blog reminds me so much of my early mommy days. I enjoy the visit when I read.

Closet of Free Samples

http://www.closetsamples.com/

The title says it all! My day is always brighter when I open the mailbox and find my freebies!

Bucktown Bargains

http://www.bucktownbargains.com/

More bargains, freebies, and samples that put a smile on my face when I save big bucks!

Feeling Fit With Dana

http://feelingfitwithdana.blogspot.com/

Dana is a 44 year old mother of three and grandmother of one, and she looks FABULOUS! Her blog is about keeping fit at any age.

Pumpkin Tart

http://pumpkintart.blogspot.com

A blog full of yummy and easy to prepare recipes!

Rockin' Deals

http://www.rockindeals4you.com/

My newest favorite blog for finding deals!

How to Be a Zen-Mama

http://www.zen-mama.com/www.zen-mama.com/Zen_Mamas_Blog/Zen_Mamas_Blog.html
A blog about letting go of your worries and being closer to your children.

The Prudent Patron

http://theprudentpatron.blogspot.com/

Another blog that saves me money and time!

Make Time for Friends

2010-03-29T06:30:00.000-07:00

When I first became a mother, I took a class at our local Jewish Community Center called "New Mommy/New Baby". My daughter was four months old, and up until that time, all of my friends had been from work. They were teachers, so when September came around, I had no one to be with except my infant daughter.

The class was the beginning of a new chapter in my motherhood journey-mommy friends. Now I had people I could compare notes with, and not just a child care book from my shelf.

When the parenting class ended, we organized a playgroup. From there, we decided we needed time to be together without diapers and bottles. We decided to learn how to play a game that our mother's played when we were younger, Mah Jongg.

Since 1996, every Thursday has been our Girls Night Out. We had seven in our group, but now number four. We play mah jongg, go out for coffee, have been out to dinner and the theater. Admittedly, it is harder to get together every Thursday, since our teens have night activities and cannot drive themselves yet. We also have parents who are ailing. But after a few weeks, the emails fly about getting back on track, and we do.

I have other friends that I made through the preschool where my twins attended. I see them less often since our kids have gone to public school, and I miss the comraderie.

My New Year's resolution was to have lunch with one friend a week. To date, I have kept it more often than not.

Seeing friends should not be complicated. If your friends are working, then meet for coffee in the evening. If the kids are in preschool, meet for breakfast after drop-off. There is some common time, if only for an hour, that you can find.

You make time for your children to see their friends, why don't you do the same for yourself?

Friday Follow!

2010-03-26T03:09:00.000-07:00

Grab a cup of tea,
And have a look and see,
My blog about slowing down
And living life more simply.

(okay, not Emily Dickenson, but I haven't even had my coffee yet!)

It's Always a Special Occasion

2010-03-25T08:50:00.000-07:00

Many years ago, we were unwrapping holiday gifts at my in-law's house. My husband's grandma, who was past 90 at the time, saw the pretty nightgown my husband gave me and said (in her thick Sicilian accent), "You can save it for a special occasion." I said no, I was going to wear it all of the time!

Think about it...how many of you grew up with untouchable "guest towels" in the powder room? The living room where you were not allowed to venture into? Special platters and serving pieces for special guests or holidays?

Yes, there is a time and place to have special items or clothing...that's what makes them special. But the problem is that we have so many special things, they sit unloved in cabinets and in basements, sometimes untouched for years on end.

If you do not use it, then is the item really special?

In my decluttering, I found some pretty items that I never used. I have a crystal bowl with silver on the rim belonged to my Nana. She always entertained and she gave this to me because I used to entertain quite a bit. Using it reminds me of her.

So instead of being on my high shelf, it sits in my refrigerator and I use it as my grape bowl. Since this fruit is a staple in my house, it is used all the time. I am loving this bowl that my beloved Nana gave to me.

And if, heaven forbid, the bowl ever breaks, I will not be heartbroken. It was used and loved, like it was meant to be.

Every day that we are alive and healthy is a special occasion.

What do you have that you love and are saving for a special occasion?

Happy Friday Follow Number 10

2010-03-18T21:12:00.001-07:00

I promise to look at your blogs this week! Thank you for coming and remember to KISS-Keep It Simple Sister! Enjoy some of these posts with a cup of tea.

Five Simple Steps for Effective Weight Loss

2010-03-16T07:19:00.000-07:00

Spring is coming...are you ready to wear clothing that is more revealing? As women, we tend to put everyone on the list, and put ourselves at the end, if at all. Many of us ignore our health by making poor food choices and not exercising.

By taking five simple steps for effective weight loss, you can help yourself get healthy and fit.

Keep the Love, Not the Object-Cleaning Made Simple Part 3

2010-03-15T06:30:00.000-07:00

Have you ever watched an episode of Clean House on The Style Network? People's homes are overrun with stuff. It gets to the point where they are so overwhelmed by all of the things, they give up ever trying to clean up their space.

Many of the families featured on this show have inherited items from deceased relatives. They are afraid to give things away, for fear that they will once again lose their beloved family member.

For other families, items are kept, even though they are not used or even liked, because someone they loved gave it to them. These unused, unappreciated items suck up our valuable energy resources by our having to store and clean them.

In Don Aslett's book, Clutter's Last Stand, he made a comment that has stayed with me when I am cleaning up or reorganizing. He wrote, "Keep the love, not the object."

What Mr. Aslett was saying was that you can keep all of the love and memories of the person who gave you what you no longer need. No one can take that away from you-ever. But you do not have to keep the vase that, in all honesty, you never really liked.

Go to one room of your house. Look around. Are there things that you see in that do not bring you joy? Remove them. Place the objects in a box somewhere out of the way.

Go back in the room and look around again. How do you feel now? Do you have more positive energy?

If you are feeling guilty about not keeping the object, before you donate it, take a picture of it so you will always have it, just in another form.

Continue to do this room by room. Not only will you feel better about your space, you will have less to clean, dust, and move around.

Friday Follow #9

2010-03-11T21:06:00.000-08:00

So happy to be back! I promise to get look at all of your blogs within the week!

Company's Coming! Getting Ready Made Simple

2010-03-09T07:11:00.000-08:00

I love to have people over my house. But not everyone does. They stress over the house not looking right, cleaning, and what to serve.

Over the years, I have developed a few shortcuts to make this easier for me. Let me share them with you.

Clean only what people are going to see and use. If you are having a barbeque, do you really need to clean to perfection the dining room and living room or even upstairs? Just make sure the downstairs bathroom is sparkling clean (I am a nut about this one. I have been to people's homes who have forgotten that someone other than themselves is going to use the facility. Enough said.) Put out fresh towels, a new box of tissues if yours is running low, and an extra roll of paper under the paper holder so people don't have to scrounge for a new one if it empties.

Vacuum Vacuum lines on a carpet give the illusion of everything having been just cleaned. This is especially important to the hallway carpet and any room you will just walk by. This is also true for wood floors. Sweep it before anyone comes in.

Dust Only dust any room that someone may be sitting in.

Use pretty paper Paper goods may not be eco-friendly, but they are company friendly. Who wants to do dishes when you want to have fun? Once in a while, paper plates are a good thing. If you have people who will help you in the clean-up process, then by all means use your dishes.

Do as much as you can the night before You'll be less stressed the day people are coming.

Buy some items already made. Purchase a cake or a tray of cookies instead of baking from scratch.

Ask company to bring something. People always ask "What can I bring?" Don't pass on this opportunity. Delegate dessert or ask someone to bring an appetizer. That way you can focus on the main meal.

Having company at your home should bring you joy and happiness, not stress. If it does, perhaps you are inviting the wrong people over, don't you think?

Cleaning Made Simple

2010-03-08T06:26:00.000-08:00

Have you ever heard someone brag, "My floors are so clean you could eat off of them?" Whenever I heard that quote, I always wondered what they weren't doing and who were they ignoring to get it so clean? Their child? Their husband? Themselves?

If you are one of those lucky ducks who have a cleaning service every week, bi-monthly or once a month, this post is still relevant for you. Even after someone comes and cleans for you, there is still a level of maintainence that has to be done until the next visit.

A few years ago, I discovered Marla Cilley, a.k.a. The Flylady. Her book, Sink Relections, was an eye opener. She teaches her readers (mostly women who are juggling many things , like paid work, family, housework and volunteering) to quiet their inner perfectionist (you know, the "all or nothing" attitude many of us seem to have) and take small, babysteps to finish the job.

And the journey all begins with shining your sink.

Her strategy, in a nutshell, is:

Make morning and evening routines
Work in one zone of your house for fifteen minutes each day (she sends her missons via a daily digest email)
Bless your house for one hour each week
Housework done imperfectly is still housework
Do one load of laundry a day

If you happen to stop and fall off the flywagon, there is no guilt. Just pick yourself up and put yourself back on.

When my husband and I built our home almost sixteen years ago, my walk-in closet was my pride and joy. Neat, orgainzed and full of pretty things to wear.

Flash forward ten years, now a stay-at-home mother of three, it was a disaster. My toddler twins touched everything, and I had a lock on my closet that was out of their reach. I would throw things in there to keep away from them and before I knew it, it was trashed. Opening the closet door would cause me so much stress and angst. How would I ever get it cleaned out when I was on my own all day long? I needed my twins naptime eat lunch, do laundry, get dinner ready, and pick up from our busy morning.

Not to mention all of the pretty clothes were mostly given away because who wears silk, dry clean only pants and black heels when you are chasing after twins all day? I did not get joy looking at my jeans and tops that were my practical daily wardrobe.

I decided to try Flylady's fifteen minutes a day method. I used the time in the morning when my husband was still home (he left at 6:45, so I was doing this very early in the morning). I started on Monday, and by Friday, I had it cleaned out! Not perfect, but I was able to toss and donate things, hide others, and put things back "in their home" where they belonged.

Are you trapped by your inner perfectionist? Are you overwhelmed by CHOAS (Can't Have Anyone Over Syndrome-gotta love the Flylady!) Do you think "Why bother?" because you cannot do it all at once?

Head to your nearest library and start reading Sink Reflections. I guarantee you won't be sorry you did.

Friday Follow #8

2010-03-05T02:50:00.000-08:00

I do my best to get back to everyone within the week! Thank you for visiting!

Create Celebrations

2010-03-04T06:06:00.000-08:00

Motherhood has been the most rewarding experience of my life. Not the easiest, mind you, but most certainly the most rewarding.

I spent a lot of years, more than I care to think about, as a single parent with a wedding ring, as my husband was busy working long hours at his job. Several of those years I was working outside the home full-time. I had almost no help at all, especially after our twins arrived. My village of friends and neighbors had all gone back to work full-time, just as I was coming home to stay.

Alone with twin babies and one second grader over sixty hours a week was a challenge that got harder at each developmental milestone my twins reached. Try chasing two toddlers going in different directions! For every ounce if joy they gave me, there was an equal amount of destruction, and many times I wondered if I would make it until they were in school all day.

With that in mind, I admit that I was doing a happy dance once my twins were in first grade.

In fact, I had a party in my home one the first day of school to celebrate this motherhood milestone-all of our children were in school all day. Ten other moms, and the newly retired kindergarten teacher, came to my home that morning to begin this new path on our motherhood journey. We came together not with Kleenex and tears, but with mimosas and muffins. And each person brought something to eat, so it was really SIMPLE to put together!

Many of my guests were mothers at home who spent a lot of time with their children. Not a single one of us felt guilty about feeling happy that there were no longer small people under our feet and in the cabinets.

I was happy to find some way to mark this new chapter of motherhood.

Is there something important you want to celebrate? Find a way to do it in a simple manner that will bring you happiness and joy.

Delegate to Simplify

2010-03-01T07:25:00.000-08:00

One of the best pieces of advice I received during my pregnancy with my first born was "to let Daddy do it his way and do not criticize his efforts". Admittedly, it was hard to see him leave the house with no diaper bag and stroller, but then again, it was not my problem.

Sure, he dressed my baby girl in an outfit not fit to be seen outside, but he was taking her out so I could have a break.

And guess what? They came back fine!

Whether it be at work or at home, you need to delegate. Sure, it may not be up to your "standard", but as long as the job is done properly and on time, does it matter?

It is the small tasks that make a big job overwhelming because you are doing it all. How many balls can you realistically juggle in the air before you drop one, then two, then them all?

Think about a job that needs to be done. Break it down into steps. Delegate some of those steps so you can focus on the bigger picture.

You will save time, energy, and find that you feel a lot better!

Happy Friday Follow #7

2010-02-26T04:30:00.001-08:00

Happy Friday Follow!

2010-02-26T02:43:00.001-08:00

The Power of No, Part 2

2010-02-20T07:04:00.000-08:00

If you have children, chances are that they are involved in various activities. After school is now filled with carpools, schleping different children to different places on different days, dinner on the run, and homework being rushed. Finally, after crashing into bed you wonder when you will have ever time for yourself again.

The weekends are no different. If your child is involved with sports, there is likely a game being played. Mulitply that by how many children you have and there goes the weekend.

How did you get here?

Because you did not say "no".

In the modern uber-competititve mommy world, the more activities your child is involved in, the better you look (for whom, I wonder).

When I was a teacher, children would tell me or write in their journals that they have too many activities, they wanted to stop. When I conveyed this message to their parents, they would get mad at me (shooting the messenger).

A wise teacher friend of mine put it like this, "As adults, we do not expect to excel in everything we do. For children, we create this expectation."

Activities are wonderful; my own children are involved in a few. But I control the schedule and the amount. If it impinges upon our family time, dinner or homework, then I tell them "no".

You can, too.

Happy Friday Follow!

2010-02-19T04:59:00.001-08:00

Valentine's Day

2010-02-13T20:13:00.000-08:00

This year's Valentine's Day will be the 28th one my husband and I celebrate together. In the beginning, he was a college freshman with no money. I received a simple red rose and a card. It was the first time I had a sweetheart on Valentine's Day.

As the years passed, I got more flowers and a nice dinner out. We never exchanged expensive presents, just small, thoughtful tokens of our mutual affection.

As life got busier, my husband would give me flowers on February 13th, since the local fresh produce market would have plenty the day BEFORE Valentine's Day. These were smaller and less expensive bouquets than from our prechildren years, because with three kids and my being a SAHM, spending fifty dollars on flowers was no longer practical.

I love not having gift pressure on this day. My husband does not want anything, really, but I have bought him some seeds for his vegetable garden. He loves to start them in the winter and have them ready for planting in the spring. I try to buy a few things he likes and some new types of seeds to try.

Keeping away the commercialism and materialsm that is Valentine's Day and showing each other how much you love and care for one another is the truest way to celebrate the holiday of love.

You Deserve Luxury

2010-02-11T19:06:00.000-08:00

Is there something that you truly love that, no matter what your financial circumstances are, you must have? Is it a monthly pedicure? A weekly latte? A subscription to your favorite magazine?

For me, my simple luxury is Victoria's Secret Body Butter in the Love Spell line. No matter what other brands I use, this is simply the best one for my skin and best smelling to my nose. It's a wonderful, simple pleasure to start my mornings in the winter.

Enjoy an Unplanned Break-Snow Day!

2010-02-10T12:02:00.000-08:00

Here in the Northeast, we are having a blizzard. While we get snowfall here each winter, it is never anything like this!

Take advantage of this unexpected day off from your everyday routines. Enjoy the snow, enjoy each other, and enjoy the winter wonderland.

The Power of "No"

2010-02-09T20:00:00.000-08:00

Ask any parent of a toddler what her child's favorite word is, and the answer would probably be a unanimous "No!". These adorable little creatures have been known to bring adults to tears by these two little letters.

Toddlers have no problem saying no to things they do not want to do.

"Eat your peas."

"No!"

"Brush your teeth!"

"No!"

"Go to bed."

"No, no, no!"

We were all once toddlers. How did we lose the ability to say no to things we do not want to do?

As women, we tend to be people pleasers. We want everyone to like us. So we say yes to volunteering for that PTA committee we do not want to head. We somehow become the head room mother, when all you wanted to be was a party helper. Someone asks us to watch their dog for the weekend, and you say yes, even though you already have a lot of other commitments.

Eventually, there comes a time when we begin to feel overwhelmed by all of the commitments we have made. We get stressed, feel pressured, and are basically unhappy.

You need to practice the saying the word no.

I'll never forget the first time I said no to a big request. I was a twenty-seven year old teacher, new to the school. and one of my senior colleagues asked me to take over her position as the United Way coordinator for our building. I already had done the job for a few years in my old school, and it was not only thankless, some of my colleagues were downright rude to me about contributing.

I looked her right in the eye and said, "I'm sorry, no, I cannot do it."

Did I feel bad? A bit.

But more than that, I felt empowered.

And my colleague still spoke to me!

Never offer a reason for saying no. If you start talking on and on, you will widen the door and weaken your answer. Just turn down the request in a polite and pleasant manner.

Look in the mirror and practice saying, "No, I am sorry that I am unable to take on another responsibility at this time."

Being able to harness the power of no will simplify your life in endless ways.

Why?

Because it will free you to say YES to the things you really want to do.

Keeping it Simple

2010-02-08T18:18:00.000-08:00

In decades past, mothers used to compete with each other over whose house was the cleanest, whose souffle rose the highest, and whose little darling was smartest.

Now, in our ever-changing, technologically driven, fast-paced, microwave, get-it-now world, mothers compete about who is the busiest. How many hours you are working, how many activities your children are involved in, how much volunteer work you are doing...quite frankly, it is exhausting just to listen!

I have heard people bragging how they don't cook anymore! Think about it...is this really something to brag about? That you are not sitting down as a family and eating healthy meals? That you have no idea what goes on during your child's day? Something is really wrong with thinking of this as a badge of honor.

I have a family. My kids are involved with various activities. I work on the weekend.

I have found ways to slow down and enjoy my family and make time for myself.

Come and smell the roses with me.